Building in Uncertainty
The global pandemic was a wakeup call. We learned that our lives, including our routines and boundaries, could change in one day. We learned that our expectations of life soon returning to “normal” were nothing but a breath of hope amidst uncertainty. As humans, we crave routine. We crave certainty. But this was taken from us all in different ways, and the uncertainty of what tomorrow brings remains.
Two certainties in life are death and uncertainty. We must learn to live with uncertainty. How can we get comfortable with it?
In addition to accepting that uncertainty is a major part of life, I've found that mentally planning for different scenarios helps lessen anxiety around what is to come because you feel more mentally prepared for disruptions.
While you can't know all of the possible scenarios, the act of doing - the act of preparing - gives you purpose and can lessen anxiety.
2021 was a year of major transitions for me and my family. After five years of living in the United States, we experienced the heavy lift of moving back overseas - now with three young children versus two. I mentally prepared myself for expected challenges and my mantra for the year was “embrace the flow of the river.” However, once we were within two weeks of our move date, the small, unexpected turns began to disrupt my flow.
While it took time, here's what I did and you can do it too.
Give yourself permission for time and space. Our culture has programmed us to feel that we constantly need to be productive, from to do lists to showing results at work. It's hard to break away from it. But the first step in handling uncertainty is to allow yourself the time to escape from reality. It could be a long walk, a tv series, a book, or creating art. Clearing your mind and reawakening your imagination can do wonders.
Think through each possible scenario. You'll never be able to predict everything, but you can write out the potential outcomes that you imagine could happen. For example, with our move last year (mostly in my head or talking out loud), I went through a lot of: "If this happens, then X, Y, or Z might happen next. What would I do in those cases?" This is also helpful to map out on paper if you're going into a negotiation at work or even an interview because you're probably feeling anxious.
Photo credit: Santiago Lacarta